What?  There’s a down side?  Yes, in a manner of speaking.  Reacting is easier.  It just happens.  It’s like a reflex – the doctor smacks your knee and your foot jumps out.  You don’t think, you just act.  It doesn’t take effort.  But you might kick someone, because you’re not really in control.  That’s WHY we parent with intention instead of just reacting.  We need to be in control – of ourselves, not our children.

This is where the down side comes in… it’s exhausting.  It is physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausting.

Physically – no more parenting from the … Read the rest

Picture if you will…

A dad in the church lobby with a two or three year old, who is throwing an all-out tantrum.  She is on the ground, kicking, yelling, m-a-d.  The dad is standing nearby but not looking at her, just letting it happen.  He is the cause of her anger.  He is not giving in to prevent the tantrum.  Instead, he is owning it.  I really wanted to walk over and tell him he was doing a great job.  He placed a boundary for her, she ran into it, and ticked her off.  But her reaction is not … Read the rest

I still don’t have this formula worked out, and I’m certain I never will since these darling Littles are always changing and so are their currencies.  But I think it goes something like this:

the offense + injuries? + is this a repeat offense? x is this arrestable for an adult?

It certainly doesn’t help that you have just a few seconds to do this formula in your head if you believe (like I do) that consequences have to be immediate.  At least there is the option to make them go to their room “while you figure out an appropriate … Read the rest

I’ve noticed that my posts about honesty tend to be on the negative side, so here’s a little something positive!

Grace is in a new independent streak, particularly in regards to cooking.  Chad taught her how to make a hot dog, and it’s now her go-to food.  (A little gross, I know).  I’ve been down for the better part of a week with the stomach flu, and she’s been SO helpful.  She gets her own snacks, offers to help, gives me blankets, asks if I need anything… she’s growing up so much.

Eli is (slightly) growing out of his crazy … Read the rest

I read an incredible blog post the other day, and I posted it on Facebook, but I also wanted to write about it.  This post talks about how as parents we feel this pressure to enjoy every moment of parenting, that the kids will grow up so fast, that we’ll blink and they’ll be gone.  Some days I blink and blink and blink, but they’re still here.  

I love my children.  I love Grace’s compassion, and Eli’s contagious happiness, and Ada’s spunk.  I love, love, love them.  I am excited to see what God has planned for them, and I … Read the rest

So I wrote last week that I had reached the breaking point with the children.  It wasn’t pretty.  Thankfully, I have a most incredible husband who worked to bring me back.  I’m on day 5, and I think I’m pretty much back.

You know those meters they show in movies with green, yellow, and red?  And inevitably it goes into the red zone and no one is watching it to turn the machine off that it’s monitoring and then it starts smoking and blows up?  I do my best to function in the green so that when things happen with … Read the rest