Having a blog has been so helpful for me.  I can look back through past posts and sort of get a read on where our family is now and where we’ve been.  Creating a new category called “Anger” tells me something about our current state of being…

I love my boy.  Eli is sweet and intellectual and honest.  He has a great moral compass (as long as his sisters aren’t involved).  But he has always had an anger issue.  I remember very clearly when he was about five, he was mad at me about something.  He glared at me and pulled his fist back like he was preparing to punch me.  I calmly squatted down so we were eye level and told him to think r-e-a-l-l-y hard about what he does next.  He let out a yell and walked away.

Five years later… he stomps, kicks, throws, scratched my car, broke the lock on the bathroom door, screams.  It’s quite unnerving, and worst of all, scares the girls.

I’ve stayed calm.  I’ve yelled.  I’ve given consequences.  I’ve walked away.  I’ve sent him to his room.  I’ve sent him outside.  I’ve made him run laps.  I’ve done nothing.  I’ve emailed the therapist (probably not soon enough…).

Why do I tell you all of this?  Not to air my dirty laundry or vent about my son, but to give you a real look at what’s going on.  I want to share this for that momma out there who is living in this same situation and feels completely alone.  You’re not.  I’m here with you.  I care about you and will share our journey through this.

I love my boy so, so much.  I will walk with him through this so I can help him succeed and become the man God is calling him to be.