In Small Group last week we discussed times where we didn’t obey God right away, but eventually agreed.  I have a list of such times.  Perhaps you don’t know me very well… I’m stubborn.  Sometimes it’s because I know I’m right.  Sometimes it’s because I think I’m right.  Sometimes it’s because you don’t have the authority to tell me I’m wrong or I can’t.  I’d like to think that as I mature I’ve learned to rein that third one in.  (Although it’s what helps me mother Ada – now you understand her a little more!)

Anyway… whenever the Holy Spirit has convicted me of something, He’s always done it calmly and gently.  He probably fully expects me to say “no” the first few times.  He doesn’t push or become impatient.  He just keeps reminding me that this isn’t good for me or our relationship.  Then, I come around, and stop my behavior.  I always feel silly for taking so long.  Here’s what gets me though – I’ve never felt like God has tried to change that about me.  I think I’m less disrespectful in my stubbornness as I’ve gotten older, and I’m not stubborn just for the sake of being stubborn, so He has definitely guided it, but He hasn’t tried to take it out of me.  He’s just patient.

So then I think about Chad.  He has to do the exact same thing.  When he wants me to consider something new (Dave Ramsey budget stuff, healthier family eating plan, other things I can’t think of at the moment…) I always say no the first time.  Then he casually drops it into conversation here and there, and I still say no. Then I begin to see the value in what he’s suggesting.  I do some investigating, and realize it’s a good idea.  I agree, we make a plan, and begin.  And I inevitably apologize for taking so long to get on board.  One time he said something to me that I’ll never forget: I knew you were stubborn when I married you, I didn’t expect that to change.  I know it will take some time for you to come around to a new idea, but I also know that once you’re on board no one will change your mind.

God loves me, stubborn and all, and knows how to work within my stubbornness rather than changing it.

Chad loves me, stubborn and all, and knows how to work within my stubbornness rather than changing it.

There is no doubt that I am married to the man God made me for, the man I get to love all the days of my life.  I only hope I can do as good a job as he is.

Chad – I love you, I respect you, I support you, and I trust you as the leader and provider for our family.