That’s right friends, I’m wearing my “judgmental” hat today.
I took Eli to his Pack Meeting yesterday afternoon, which is where all of the Cub Scouts get together for awards and other stuff. (Usually the different grade levels meet individually). These poor boys had to sit for AN HOUR while the leaders taught about fire safety, both if there is a house fire, and if you make a camp fire. This is important stuff, I know. And after that they handed out awards, and the boys had to be quiet and respectful while their friends got their awards. Again, important stuff for Cub Scouts. HOWEVER. The parents of these boys were close by. 7 or so Cub Scout leaders were close by. But no one seemed to think anything needed to be done about these 20-ish elementary-aged boys were loud and rude and disrespectful. I was so frustrated. I stood very close to Eli and made sure he was listening. I had to get after our leader’s son for messing with him.
So. What would you do in that situation? When there’s a fireman there talking about fire safety and the boys erupt into all the fun things to do with a camp fire, rather than discuss safety. When the boys’ parents are watching (sort of) and doing nothing. When someone else’s kid tries to get yours in trouble. WHEN YOU JUST WANT TO START SLAPPING POEPLE. If parents are going to stand by letting their children be disruptive and disrespectful, who is ever going to stop them?
Our church did a series a while back called “Orange” and one of the points was that we need to “widen our circle” of people who will be good influences on our children, and us. We need to do this parenting gig together. You and your close circle of friends are a team. You need to have people you trust to invest into your lives and the lives of your children. The people in my circle have full permission to intervene if I don’t see one of my children doing something wrong or dangerous. I’m not sure everyone in Cub Scouts has invited me into their circle… but I might just jump in there anyway.
And, let’s be honest. Eli’s not a perfect boy. (Is there such a thing?) But in this crowd he looked like a saint. I’m very proud of him for how much he loves Cub Scouts, and he takes it very seriously. He even opened the car door for me when we left. It’s like he transforms once he puts that cute blue shirt on. I love my little Mister.
I do like this post. Thanks for being brave enough to write it. This isnt about kids, really…its about parents and adults teaching the life skill of respect. I love what you said -lets help each other. Are you OK with others in your circle…did you even know there was a circle? Seriously…I need your help, speak into my kids life when they are doing nothing, when they do something terrific and when you see they could use a little nudge in the better direction.
I like this too, Janna. I have shared with a few friends – that I'm concerned about the "chaos" Sophie is exposed to in situations like these – because we've experienced similar episodes. But do we shelter them from it? I don't think so. We TEACH them how to be respectful and kind. I ABSOLUTELY expect my circle to invest in my children – to lovingly guide them, praise them, and correct them – and I will lovingly invest in yours, if you welcome me into your circle.
Oh you're in there sister! You both are. 🙂