Category Archives: Teenagers

Which battles do I choose?

Faith, Parenting, Teenagers

I haven’t written in a while.  This season we’re in calls for seeking advice rather than giving any.  I feel steeped in “Do I choose THIS battle?”, quite similarly to when I had three preschoolers.  Now, however, there are three teenagers who are suddenly my size.  I no longer squat down to look them in the eye.  Instead, I notice their eyes are quite level with my own.

Let me first say that my kids are amazing.  They are fun, funny, responsible, kind, respectful, and polite.  I don’t have much to complain about.

In spite of this, they are also … Read the rest

Learning to Listen

Parenting, Teenagers

“You don’t scare me.  I have three teenagers at home.”  Actual words I said recently.

This stage is growing me more than any before.  The biggest area of growth I think is learning how to listen.  Well, learning how to listen to a teenager.

Active Listening
The kids know when I’m not really listening and just throwing in a Wow! or That’s cool! simply to keep things moving.  I have to stop, make eye contact, listen, and ask questions.  This isn’t teenager specific, I’m finding it’s just good manners.  Also, when they feel heard and understood, their hearts are much … Read the rest

Parenting Big Kids

Parenting, Teenagers

I am stretching and growing, and sometimes I am resisting stretching and growing.  We are being asked to parent differently than we used to, because we have different kids in our house.  They are no longer three and completely dependent; they are in middle and high school, and fighting tooth and nail against dependence.

I used to say, “Here’s your lunch.”  That gave way to, “What would you like for lunch?”  And now I hear, “Hey mom, can I make ______ for lunch?”  It’s weird, and I have so much more food in the house than I used to…and also … Read the rest

Their Disrespect Game is Strong (but I’m Stronger)

Parenting, Teenagers

As our kids get older, it’s tricky to know what is and isn’t appropriate to blog about.  Their privacy is important to me.  I don’t want them to someday discovery that I have a blog (in a very, very loose sense of the term) and be mortified about what I’ve shared.

But here goes.

Our children are 11, 12, and 13 years old.  The disrespect in our home is on an upward swing.  “Well, Janna, we don’t let our kids be disrespectful.”  That’s wonderful.  We don’t let them be disrespectful either, and yet here we are.  They are free-willed, eyes-rolling, … Read the rest