Diving right in…

After thirty minutes of talking in the therapist’s office, we moved to the “play therapy” room per Grace’s request.  Grace gets to play in the sand table and I get to talk to the therapist. Win-win.  I told the therapist that in my weak moments I am in a place where I’m ready for Grace to be on medication because I want her to be happy.  I want her to be able to handle life.  I want her to be a care-free nine-year-old girl!  In my heart I know we aren’t ready for this, but sometimes I’m weak and just want her pain to go away.  Then I said, “If she can’t handle life at nine, what is going to happen to her when life really gets hard??”

Then the therapist said the most amazing, reassuring words to me.  She told me that Grace WILL be able to handle life because she already IS handling life.  She is having to learn skills that most children don’t until they’re much older.  Then they’re blindsided.  But Grace will know what to do because she’s already doing it.  And this is when I melted into my chair in relief.

I’m not just giving her tools to use in the future, she’s using them now.  What I am doing right now matters and it is making a difference.  Right now.

I’ve been so future-minded that I forget to look at right now.  Right now she’s nine.  Right now I get annoyed that school and homework are such a big deal to her, but she’s nine – what else is there??

So that’s my self-challenge right now: How do I maintain a future-focus, but not forget to notice where they are today?  What kind of adults do I want them to be… but they’re still elementary-age kids?  I don’t know.  I’m thinking on that, and praying about it.

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