Do you ever feel that way as a parent?  That you’re making it up as you go?  Your kids spring something on you, and you’re left speechless and scrambling for some sort of consequence that is suitable for this offense you never thought you’d have to deal with.

For instance.

Eli was in a phase (PRAISE JESUS that I get to use the word was) where he got this horrible attitude whenever he disagreed with me and would be downright disrespectful and rude to me.  He did it in the car one day while I was driving, and I was left scrambling for a consequence.  They need to be immediate in my opinion.  I looked around, and saw my gum.  My spicy, not fruity, grown-up Eclipse gum.  Here buddy, chew on this!  Yeppers.  I made him chew my gum for about 15 seconds while he cried and drooled white and mumbled something about how it was burning his tongue.  But it worked.  I’m not asking for an award, I’m just giving you an example.

I feel like I’m left scrambling all the time.  These darling Littles of mine come up with new and exciting ways to challenge my parenting skills, to see what I’m really made of.  “Let’s throw her a curve ball!”  Sigh.  How do I parent this??  Sometimes I just have to send them to their room and tell them I need to talk to dad about what their consequence will be.  Really I just have no idea and I need time to come up with something.

This is where it is essential to have other parents in your life who you respect, whose children are older than yours, whose children are the kind you pray yours turn out like, that you can turn to for advice.  When your son sprays a brand new aerosol bottle of sunblock in his bedroom until it is empty (for the second time).  When your son starts a phase of kicking his sister in the crotch.  When your daughter starts a phase of dropping to the floor in tears when she’s sad over the teeniest thing.  When your daughter might honestly be more stubborn than you are but stays perfectly calm all the while.  When what you really want to do is send them out to play and lock all the doors.

So yes, sometimes I find myself making it up as I go.  I pray for wisdom, patience, grace, I picture this Little as a grown-up and consider what life lesson they need to learn right at this moment.  I do my best to give an adequate consequence, then pray that I didn’t just screw that up.