I don’t need you

I don’t mean YOU, I do need YOU.  Today I’m thinking about THINGS I don’t need.  Please to enjoy.

  • I don’t need you, Fine China.  I have three children, so when do really expensive, really breakable dishes become handy?  When I want to feel fancy we get out candles and cloth napkins.  Done.  That’s as fancy as I get.
  • I don’t need you, Valentine’s Day.  My husband loves me well year round, so don’t go marketing yourself all cheap and easy like with flowers and chocolates.  A gift he doesn’t have to put thought into isn’t a gift I want.
  • I don’t need you, New Year’s Eve.  You’re just a flip of the calendar just like the other eleven months.  And, by the way, my kids will be up by 7am regardless, so I will be in bed long before midnight.  But don’t worry, I’ll still kiss my husband first – I can do that anytime.
  • I don’t need you, color-coordinated holidays.  I can’t wear pink or red on Valentine’s Day (you already know my thoughts about you), green on St. Patrick’s Day, red/white/blue on the Fourth of July – I just can’t.  I will plan my wardrobe accordingly if we’re traveling during those days just to make sure I don’t accidentally wear those colors.  That would be so embarrassing.  **I don’t care if others wear those colors, I don’t make fun of them, they can wear whatever they want.  So can I.
  • I don’t need you, traditions that make no sense to me.  Cutting the cake at a wedding?  Why?  Why are you a big deal?  I can’t bring myself to stand in a crowd for something I can’t see anyway to take a picture of you eating cake.  I’m still happy for your wedding and marriage, and I’ll still enjoy the cake, I just don’t get this tradition.  **This is not meant to take away from you doing this at your wedding, it’s your wedding!  Do what you want!

I know there are more, I’m sure my husband could quickly add to this list.  But for now that’s the end of my rant.  What about you?  What don’t you need?

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